Register
 

The Executioners



Author Topic: Hand egg vs. Football  (Read 47 times)

Offline HUROME

  • The Herald
  • TEXN Directors
  • Lyftee
  • Posts: 425
  • TROUT SLAP!
Hand egg vs. Football
« on: March 30, 2013, 14:58:03 »


So I'm a firm believer that u Yankees got the whole football thing wrong and I've voiced for years and today I came across this text that some anonymous dude wrote somewhere on the internet.. Pretty much sums it up for me.
And to be fair its not just about hand egg, All "American" sports are like this (I think, haven't seen much NBA since I was a wee lad)

"The wonderful thing about football is how creative it is. You see, in America, the action is deliberately kept short, so that the sponsors can get in as many commercials as possible, and also, so that the players don’t have TO THINK for too long.
They get instructions from the quarterback, who has, in turn, received them from the offensive coach, so no one has to think for themselves.
 
This is the Dick Cheney version of creativity, otherwise known as “Doing exactly what you’re told”.
So, you get 4 seconds of extremely violent action, and then the only genuinely creative activity involved: a beer commercial.

 So, American football is played like a series of advertising jingles while soccer is played like jazz.
And while we’re on the subject, why do the Americans insist on calling it soccer, why do they have such a problem in calling it football?
It’s a game played with a ball that is struck with the foot. Hence, FOOT-BALL. You see? ARE YOU FOLLOWING THIS, AMERICA?

The clue is in the title. It’s not that difficult.
Whereas American football, as they call it, is a game where an object that’s not really a ball at all - it’s the wrong shape for a ball - is carried around by HAND, and occasionally THROWN for other people to catch in their.. HANDS.
You see? Only one person in each team is allowed to actually KICK the ball, and they have to be specially brought on to the field to do it. I suppose in its own way that is a form of creativity, it’s quite a creative use of language…
you know, saying one thing and meaning something COMPLETELY…DIFFERENT."


Dunno what i wanna see happen here but It made me giggle anyways so its all good. That will be all

o7
Always outnumbered, never outgunned!


Offline Forkor

  • Uninitiated
  • Posts: 1
Re: Hand egg vs. Football
« Reply #1 on: March 31, 2013, 14:02:03 »
As a Yankee I agree with the beer commercial ;)

Offline idun

  • Admins
  • Master Lyfter
  • Posts: 1406
Re: Hand egg vs. Football
« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2013, 02:56:26 »
'MERICA